I took my five-year-old son Cordell out to dinner Saturday night and before we were done with dinner a total stranger approached us. She walked over to our table and said “ my friend and I are educators and we want to say that we appreciate that you are spending time with your son, it is very important.” I responded with “thank you” and it felt good to have someone recognize my son and I spending time together alone. It is not important for me to get “props” for being a father because it should be something that is expected but sadly there are so many kids today that do not have their father’s in their lives. I was one of those kids but it has made me a better parent as well.

A child that doesn’t receive the proper parenting may not have the best life and as a parent you want the child to have the best life. There is not one way to parent a child; it all depends on the child that you are parenting. My son is only 5, so I have a long way to go, and I am still learning about how to be a better parent every day. However, I believe the foundation of being a parent starts when a child is first born and it never ends even when they become adults. I created a structure for my son that has been the same for years and it seems to be very affective. We eat our meals together, we talk about how our days were, we do planned activities weekly, and I spend time reading to him. We also do a lot of educational activities together. I cannot express how important it is to show your child or children that you love and care for them, it comes along with parenting. If I remember correctly parenting is defined as the care, love, and guidance given by a parent. Children have their slip-ups, which require some type of discipline. I chose early not to discipline my son physically; I chose the method of taking what he likes the most away from him, and explaining to him why it is not okay to do whatever he did wrong. Like I mentioned earlier, you cannot parent every child the same way, my method of disciplining my son happened to work for me. I can give my son that look that he is familiar with and he gets back in line.

I can go on and on about parenting and the importance of it. There is no one way or right ways of doing it but you have to find your way of doing it and master it.

~Cortez

After doing some research I learned that consumers either use credit because its convenient or they use it if they lose their job to make everyday purchases. According to Richard (2010), when college students develop bad habits for using credit cards in college they can carry that bad habit over into their every day life. For every myth there is a truth behind it. The truth is according to Dave Ramsey (2009), there is no positive side to credit card use, and you will spend more if you use credit cards.

Using cash is better than using credit cards. When you use cash in a sense you can feel your income leaving from you. Using cash also helps you manage your money better, example: you can not spend what you do not have, compared to with a credit card you can spend what you do not have and regret it once your statement comes at the end of the month.

Credit cards are not 100% bad in my opinion; they can be used as a tool to help build your credit rating. Using your credit card(s) to pay a few monthly bills is fine as long as you pay the card(s) off in full when the bills come.

At the end of the day cash is always king!

~Cortez

According to Rao (2010) there are ways you can go about lending money to family and friends. The best way to go about lending family or friends money is to treat it as a business deal, which includes adding interest. From my experience I stand behind not loaning family or friends money, if I have it, I rather give it to them as a gift to prevent the possibility of ruining that relationship. Times are hard for a lot of people right now so the calls may be coming in. If you decide to open that checkbook for that person that is calling with their story, please consider writing the check as a gift first.

~Cortez

Prior to our move to Minnesota, I had spent summers there with my stepfather’s family and those visits help reinforce the wrong message about life to me. I was exposed to: alcohol abuse, drug abuse, physical abuse, mental abuse, stealing, lying, and pretty much anything that you wouldn’t want your child being exposed to.

I hung out with my stepfather’s youngest brother and his friends when we first got to Minnesota just like I did when I went there for the summers. They were already into drug dealing, so I started right back dealing again once I got there and learned their way of doing things. My stepfather’s youngest brother was involved in a gang along with his friends, so I decided to join as well to fit in. I thought I was an adult around that time, I pretty much did what I wanted to do, and I did not have to answer to anybody.

I loved school even though the people that I was around were not educated and did not care for school. I was always on time to school and I received good grades but no one was ever there to simply tell me good job. I did not attend my 8^th grade graduation because no one in my family made a big deal about it.

My days seemed to never change, if I was not in school, I was out selling drugs and running with people that had already gave up on life. The people I was around carried guns because they had enemies, so I began to carry one as well because I thought it was cool. I was never a violent kid; I hadn’t even been in a fight. I got along with everyone; I even had a good friend that was in the opposite gang that I was in. I felt in my heart that I was a good person but I lacked guidance. I began to make what I thought was a lot of money selling drugs. My first encounter with the police came about from driving without a license. I had my own car at age thirteen and fourteen, I felt as if I was an adult because I was doing everything that I thought at the time adults did. Carrying a gun caught up with me, I spent my first time in juvenile jail behind it. I do not recall anyone telling me, what I was doing would someday get me in a lot of trouble.

All of the criminal things that I was doing came to an end. I was taken away from my family and put in a boy’s home. Being put in the boy’s home was the best thing that could have ever happened to me up until then, because there is where I met the person that showed me there was a better way to live life. It took fifteen years to finally get the guidance that I needed. I know that my past experiences helped make me the person that I am today, that is why I wouldn’t change anything about my past. Now my two boys will be able to share their stories about being a Child With Guidance.

Born in Iowa and raised there for the first 13 years of my life, I had a father figure in the home. From what I know now, it would probably have been a more positive situation had he not been. Any man can play the role of a father but if he doesn’t express love to his child or spend quality time with his child, then in my eyes he isn’t a father. My mother was young, caught up in the things that a lot of young mothers are into. Other men were around but as far as I can remember, I was never taught which train of life to take when the trains they were on pulled up to the station.

So it came down to a child making decisions on my own. What could I choose except choose to follow others around me? Studies say that the first five years of a child’s life are most important. I believe in that. The lack of affection and love had a major affect. At age 13 I decided to put some of the things to test that I visualized growing up. I sold rock cocaine. I was a child and I assumed that was the way to make enough money to get a nice pair of shoes for school. I was not caught at first so I felt I was successful. That is when the life of a baby duck with no guidance started for me.

To be continued…